WHITE WOMEN:
 First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
 Second date: You get to grope all over and make out
 a bit.
 Third date: You get to have sex but only in the
 missionary position.
 
 IRISH WOMEN:
 First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
 Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
 20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have
 sex.
 
 ITALIAN WOMEN:
 First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive
 restaurant.
 Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes
 Spaghetti & meatballs.
 Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you &
 insists On a 3-carat ring.
 5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together &
 hate the thought of
 having sex. 

 
 JEWISH WOMEN:
 First Date: You get terrific head.
 Second Date: You get even more great head.
 Third Date: You tell her you’ll marry her and never
 get head again.
 
 CHINESE WOMEN:
 First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner
 but Nothing happens.
 Second date: You buy her an even more expensive
 dinner. Nothing happens again.
 Third date: You don’t even get to the third date and
 you’ve Already realized nothing is ever going
 to happen.
 
 INDIAN WOMEN:
 First date: Meet her parents.
 Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
 Third date: Wedding night.
 
 BLACK WOMEN:
 First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive
 dinner.
 Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends
 a real Expensive dinner.
 Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
 Tenth Date: She’s pregnant by someone other than
 you.
 
 MEXICAN WOMEN:
 First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get
 drunk
 on Tequila, and
 have sex in the back of her
 car.
 Second Date: She’s pregnant.
 Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her
 mother,
 father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her
 brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her
 father’s girlfriend’s mother, her two cousins, her
 sister’s Boyfriend and his three kids move in and
 you
 live on rice and
 beans for the rest of your
 life in your home that used to be nice, but now
looks
 like a home along
 the Tijuana strip.
 
 ARAB WOMEN:
 First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters,
 Cousins, Aunts, Uncles,
 Friends and entire arab
community finds out.
 Second Date: You are shot dead.
 No third date.